Mexico Medical Student |

Well, I’m alone now–Claudia’s in Texas, having flown out of here this weekend to take care of some family and personal affairs there. I’ll be by my lonesome for a week. I miss her of course, but it’s also hard because it’s a break from routine. That sounds funny for me to say that since I’m the kind of person who has NO set routine whatsoever, but there are a few constants that I do take for granted. Being alone is cool for a couple of days, but after that it sucks, at least for me. I haven’t been married that long, but one gets used to these things quickly I think.

It also underscores a feeling I’ve been feeling for a while in med school: I feel very alone there, too. Sure I have class friends but not really anyone with whom I do anything with on a regular basis except for the special event which may happen a few times a semester. I understand that other students, particularly those with families/S.O.s, are going to maximize their non-study time with them (including myself), but there is something to be said for just hanging out and studying as a group or coordinating movies/activities among several people. It doesn’t help being an older student not into the “party” scene or intramural sports, since that’s where a lot of people focus their extracurricular activities (having blown out 90% of my left ACL a few years ago in an accident, I’m not going to change this very soon). I know that I don’t help sometimes by not being more communicative with others. I tend to be the person who needs to be talked to first rather than the one who initiates a conversation. I know certain classmates (both those who I talk to and those with whom I don’t) read this blog, so I’ll say that I’m not talking about anyone in particular with any of this–just that I feel disconnected from everyone and everything and I’m not sure if that’s just part of the process learning how to deal with time management, stresses, etc. or just my being somewhat dysfunctional. Or both.